Episode 179: The Importance of a Big Vision to Lead an Extraordinary Life

Unlock the transformative power of a clear and compelling vision for your life. In this episode, you will discover the top 5 benefits of developing a strong vision: enhanced focus, better decision-making, more resilience, and increased motivation. Join us to learn how committing to your ideal life can create profound changes and guide you toward your goals.


Topics

  • Vision as an inspiring picture of the desired life.

  • Prioritizing connection, depth, adventure, creativity, and growth in life

  • 5 Reasons for Having a Big Vision for an Extraordinary Life.

Links

👉 Want to dig deeper into what you learned in the podcast? ⁠⁠⁠Go to selfgrowthnerds.com/school to work together!⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠👈⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

✨🏕️Join Rachel Meltzer and me in Brave New Path, a very intimate retreat, designed for quirky creatives obsessed with self-growth and ready to reignite their spark!🏕️✨


Transcript

[AUTO-GENERATED]

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:00:06]:

Welcome to the self growth nerds podcast. I'm your host Marie, a courage coach, creative soul and adventure seeker. Since thru hiking the Pacific Crest Trail in 2019, I'm on a mission to help you embrace your most confident self so you can achieve your dreams too. If you're eager for deep conversations, big questions and meaningful connections, join me on the quest to discovering how we can create a more magical and memorable life. Hello nerds, how are you? I am feeling on fire today and I love the topic of this episode. We are talking about the importance of having a big vision for your life. Let's first start with a definition of what a vision is, then I'll give you mine as an example. And then we'll go through 5 reasons why I think having a big vision is essential to creating an extraordinary life, alright? Okay, so when I talk about having a vision, what I mean is having an inspiring picture of the kind of life you want to create.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:01:28]:

To me a 5 year plan sounds like you're following a path, To me a 5 year plan sounds like you're following a path that already exists. Like I'm a graphic designer and in 5 years I should become a creative director. If that excites you, wonderful. But a vision goes much further than that. It answers questions like what do you want your life to be about? How do you want to feel? What are the kinds of things that you want to try? What's the legacy that you want to leave behind? What would you be proud of? At the end of your life, if you look back, what do you want to be able to say? Now having a vision seems fluffy for most people. Like, yeah, yeah. That sounds nice and everything, but I have bills to pay. So maybe I'll do that one day, but not my priority.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:02:22]:

In this episode I wanna make a case for why it's so much more important than we think. Having a vision can take your life from fine, you know, I'm getting by, to extraordinary. I am going after what I want with courage and grit and love in my heart. Let's take my story as an example. Back when I was doing graphic design. I was following the typical path of a graphic designer but was not feeling excited about what was next. I was growing increasingly annoyed about putting my creativity to the service of others. I wanted to do my own thing.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:03:07]:

And when I discovered coaching, I started crafting my own path. I kind of didn't understand it was possible before. I knew it intellectually, but I didn't understand it in my heart. I just thought you follow the opportunities that you are given and you make the most of it. My whole life my dad had been saying you can design your own life, but it was not until about 6 years ago that I realized what that actually meant. You can literally say, this, this is what I want. Let's figure out how to make it happen. Earlier today, I was on an assessment call with someone who is interested in coaching, and they were telling me about the industry they want to have success in.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:03:58]:

They said it's hard because there are gatekeepers. And those gatekeepers only allow a few people in at a time. We talked about 2 different kinds of attitudes you can have in a situation like this. One is more passive. You can wait to get your invite and if you never receive it, you say well, it was not my fault. It was a tough industry to get in. Or you can be more active and decide, you know what? I belong in that industry and I'm going to figure out how to get in. If I have to make friends with the gatekeepers, then so be it.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:04:36]:

I believe in myself so much that I'm going to find a way. The person I was on the call with told me the story of Madonna, which I thought was super inspiring. So at the start of her career, before she became an icon, she was struggling to break into the music industry, and she needed important people to listen to her music. So apparently one of the things that she did is she would hand out demo tapes, like cassette tapes, with her music on it in dance clubs. So notice how she was not like, oh, I don't wanna annoy anyone, I, you know, they're having fun, like who am I? No no, she was she was there handing out the cassette tapes, and one of the DJs was impressed. So he introduced her to the founder of a recording company. This person was in the hospital at the time recovering from a heart infection. Well Madonna just went to the hospital and played the music for him in his room.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:05:37]:

She was like, he needs to listen to this. And that's how she became famous. That's how everything started because she had such a strong vision for herself. Now let me share my own. The kind of life I am actively building every day is one where connection, depth, adventure, creativity, and growth are prioritized. I spend a lot of time with the people I love, whether it be my partner, my family, my friends, or my clients. All the people I surround myself with are inspiring and present and real. They dream big and they're vulnerable.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:06:24]:

They love what they do. I love what I do. I am deeply passionate. I am constantly learning. As one of the best coaches in the world, I make an impact every day. I encourage everyone I encounter and work with to be their truest selves and to go after what they really want. Because that's how I believe we create a better world. And plus, I have the flexibility to adapt my schedule to my needs, whether that means taking time off to help a loved one or going on a spontaneous trip.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:07:02]:

I live in a beautiful house with big windows, lots of natural light, lots of love, lots of room to breathe, and plenty of time to read. That last sentence rhymes, but that was not intentional. Now I wanna dive into the five reasons why I think having a big vision is essential if you want to lead an extraordinary life. But before we do, I want to remind you about the retreat, the Brave New Path Retreat that I'm organizing with my friend and my colleague and creative coach, Rachel Meltzer. This retreat is happening from October 4th to October 7, 2024, and it's for those of you who feel kinda lost, who feel kinda bored. You your life is fine. You're doing fine, but you want extraordinary. At this retreat, what we're going to do is create your vision and figure out how to stop playing it safe, how to stop being small, and go all in after what's been calling your heart.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:08:11]:

This retreat is like no other retreat I've ever heard of. It's a mix of personal growth, and deep bonding, and time in nature. We found a super beautiful high end chalet in the woods. It's an hour and a half from Montreal, where I live, in Quebec, Canada. And it's going to be in the fall, so the forest is going to be beautiful, orange and red and yellow. It's close to mountains and lakes, small cute small villages, and you're going to have free time to go explore. And the rest of the time, we're gonna walk you through workshops and transforming conversations, as well as personalized coaching for each one who participates. There are 9 spots available because there are 9 beds.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:09:05]:

And so that's it. Once these spots are gone, they're gone. If you're interested, go to selfgirlnerds.com/retreat. This is going to change your life, okay? Now reason number 1 why having a vision is essential to leading an extraordinary life. Because it gives you focus, it tells you how to spend your time, your money, and your energy. It reduces decision fatigue. Every time you have to make a decision, you ask yourself which option is going to take me closer to my vision. It helps you know what to prioritize in your schedule.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:09:47]:

What books to read, what podcasts to listen to, which relationships to invest in and which to let go of, what partner to choose, where to hang out, what skills to improve, and more. I'm always asking myself, in order to turn my vision into a reality, what needs to be improved? What can I work on this year? In 2024, for example, if you've listened to my podcast episode about my vision for the year, you know that 2 of my focuses are discipline and collaboration. So I've been getting up earlier. I've been setting up systems. I've been reaching out to more people, working with more people, like Rachel is a perfect example of that, and going on coffee chats with people in my area. All of these actions are informed by my vision. I'm also very particular when it comes to the friends I prioritize. If I'm going to spend a lot of time with you, I want to leave feeling energized, feeling seen and accepted as I am, feeling like you support my dreams.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:10:59]:

And if you don't, I simply don't have time for you in my life. So that was reason number 1. Makes it easier to make decisions about all aspects of your life. Reason number 2, why having a vision is essential to creating an extraordinary life, is it's motivating. It gets you out of passive mode and into active mode, which makes you feel alive. Last night I was having a drink with a doctor friend of mine. She was telling me about one of her patients that she's followed for multiple years. Now he's about 17 years old and his parents are the kind of parents that have very high expectations of the kind of person he should become.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:11:46]:

Like, you've got to become a doctor or a lawyer or an engineer, otherwise that's not good enough. Well guess what? That kid, that teenager is addicted to weed right now. And all he does is smoke weed and he says that he's not interested in anything. But that is not true. My guess here, and obviously I don't know this person, but people like this have become my clients 10, 20 years down the road when they can't fake it anymore. They have integrated that being their authentic selves is not good enough. But they're not interested in the path that other people expect them to take. So they do their best, but their heart is not into it and they have to spend a lot of time numbing.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:12:40]:

And then people start telling them they're lazy, they're not trying hard enough, they're not ambitious. But that is not true. It's just that they don't have the kind of ambition that's socially accepted. And when they dared to talk about their own authentic ambitions, they were laughed at and made fun of. I remember a client of mine whose childhood dream was to ride a horse across Iceland, And she had a memory of telling her parents about it and them laughing and saying it was unrealistic. And, you know, they were not badly intentioned at all. But these small moments can instill doubt into you. So imagine if you live in a family or in a society that is constantly putting your dreams down or making you feel delusional for wanting what you want, eventually chances are you will start believing them.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:13:34]:

And you will try to fit into a mold that's not authentic to you. And when you're stuck in a mold that is uncomfortable, you have to numb the discomfort by smoking weed, drinking alcohol, overeating, watching lots of television, maybe overworking so that you never have to sit down with yourself because you've been taught to ignore your inner calling. Now if you lack motivation, if you find it hard to show up for your life, that might be why. That might be because you've been ignoring your authentic calling. It is certainly not because you are lazy or you lacked ambition. It's just that you were made to doubt your ambition at some point in the past and you can reconnect to yourself and what you want deep down. I guarantee you, you're not going to need to numb as much as you did. That makes me think of my client who said that when we started working together, she would just play Zelda on the sofa and smoke weed.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:14:47]:

And once she started feeling excited about her dream, once she started owning what she wanted unapologetically, it was so much easier to feel motivated. It was easier to connect with people in her life and to feel like what she was doing was meaningful. So that is reason number 2. Having a big vision that inspires you is essential because it's going to make you feel alive and motivated. Okay, reason number 3, alignment with your values creates a stronger sense of fulfillment. What does that even mean? You know the empty feeling you get when you do something you don't care about? I remember designing the map of a shopping mall and feeling like dead in my soul. I would go hide in the toilets at work and it would just take everything for me to go back to my desk. And the the weeks were so long.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:15:55]:

By Tuesday at lunch, I was like, oh my god. I just wanna be the weekend already. I remember designing an ad for back to school makeup, I think, for young teenagers. And I just wanted to be stabbed in the eyes. Apologies. Apologies for this graphic analogy. It made me feel dead inside. That is what happens when there's an incoherence between your mind, your heart, and your actions.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:16:28]:

And what I mean by that is you're doing something like designing that map of the shopping mall and your heart wants to be somewhere else, but your mind says, no, we we need this job. There is an internal split that makes you feel out of integrity. And being out of integrity leads to lots of different things like disconnection from your core self, from your inner fire, frustration because what you do every day feels pointless, versus if you're pursuing a vision that is aligned with your values, your life will feel more meaningful. My values which I mentioned earlier are growth, adventure, depth, connection, and creativity. I make sure that my mind, my heart, and my actions are aligned with these values Every day, every week, and every month. These five values are like 5 plants inside of me. I need to water them regularly, otherwise they will start wilting and I will start to feel it in my energy. It's exactly like Inside Out 2.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:17:46]:

I just went to see this movie at the cinema, it's amazing. So Riley, the main character, she has a tree inside of her. Every time she does an action, it grows a root that forms the tree of her sense of self. So if she does something kind, then it grows a root that says I am a good person. It's the same thing with your values. Every time I do something that's related to growth, to adventure, to depth, to connection, or to creativity, it reinforces my sense of self. Let me give you another analogy. Let's say your values are like buckets.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:18:27]:

My five values are 5 buckets and every time I do something that's related to adventure, for example, I add water to that bucket. Then at the end of the week or at the end of the month, if all of my buckets are full, I feel fulfilled. And that is reason number 3 for why having a vision is essential to creating an extraordinary life because being aligned with your values is going to create a stronger sense of self and a stronger sense of fulfillment. Reason number 4, committing to a big vision will help you take full advantage of the human experience. You're never gonna discover what you are actually capable of if you don't challenge yourself. If you don't push yourself out of your comfort zone. If what you have planned in the future are all things that you already know you can accomplish, it's kinda boring. You don't get to become the next version of you.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:19:34]:

You don't need to up level because you already have everything that it takes to get it done. There are so many possibilities nowadays. So many things you can try if you allow yourself to be imperfect. If you allow yourself to fail and get up again and, you know, if you're playful like a like a kid. Kids don't mind getting dirty. They just want to have fun. You don't need permission to write a book, you can even self publish now. You can do a pottery class or a sewing class.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:20:09]:

You can start a podcast. You can start a business. You can learn all of that online. In lots of places you can also explore your sexuality quite safely, you can be in a thrupple, like one of my favorite coaches Martha Beck. She's in a thrupple with 2 other amazing women. You can sell everything you have and go live on a boat with your family. And these are just a few of the infinite possibilities that are available to you if you open your mind to them. Last weekend on Sunday night, I was having dinner with my partner feeling super grateful.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:20:48]:

I told him that I had envisioned a partner who would be my adventure buddy in the outdoors, but also sexually. And it was really funny because that day we went on a long bike ride, and the night before we had a date with another couple. So my vision had turned into a reality. And he said that he had also been dreaming about that, but sort of figured it was too much to ask, and probably not possible. So we were both astonished that actually it was. And because we had held on to our visions, we had stayed open, it had turned into a reality. So think about something you would like to try that seem kinda too good to be true, that seems impossible. And you're probably going to be tempted to argue for your limitations.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:21:52]:

To tell me, yeah, no, Marie. Like, it's just not possible because x, y, and z. There's always a reason why it's not possible. But if it's something that you really want, I encourage you to start thinking about how you can make it a reality. And the answer is not gonna come right away. You just wanna hang out in the question and just stay open and stay curious and see what comes your way. K? That was reason number 4. Having a big vision helps you take full advantage of what life has to offer.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:22:27]:

By the way, little behind the scenes secret. I've been hitting pause on the recording every now and then so I can eat a cherry. Okay, reason number 5. The last one. Having a vision makes you more resilient. It's much easier to overcome obstacles when there's a compelling reason. Like giving birth. No one would give birth if it was like a watermelon that came out at the end.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:22:58]:

No. You are willing to go through the pain of delivery because you know that having a baby is gonna be like one of the most meaningful experiences of your life. When I was on the Pacific Crest Trail, there was so many moments that I was sick of it. But I could hang in there when I visualized reaching the northern terminus. It's easier to hang in there when it's tough if you can focus on a long term goal that is important to you. Having a big vision can also sometimes give meaning to the struggle. Like there must be something for me to learn in this. I know that's the case for me when I'm going through like a a more challenging period in my business.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:23:51]:

I'm like, okay well this needs to happen in order for me to become a stronger business owner. That's just part of the journey. That's the cost to pay. Just like toddler have to get frustrated in order to learn to manage difficult emotions. If their parents always do what the toddler wants them to, and they always feel good, they're not going to be equipped to handle life. And I have to talk about Viktor Frankl. I feel like I bring back Viktor Frankl quite often, but that's because his story speaks volumes. He wrote a book called A Man's Search for Meaning about the time when he was in a concentration camp and about how he survived.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:24:42]:

One of the ways that he survived is he would give meaning to the pain. He figured that he was going to learn so much from that period of his life, and that he would be able to bring this back to his practice as a psychologist. And he was right, his books changed the world. If your mindset is, I am here to leave a legacy, there is a lot that you can endure. So that was it for today. These are the five reasons why I think having a big vision is essential to creating an extraordinary life. Let's summarize. Reason number 1, having a vision gives you focus, helps you figure out how to spend your time, your money, and your energy.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:25:31]:

Reason number 2, gets you out of passive and into active mode. It's more motivating, it makes you feel alive. Reason number 3, being in alignment with your values creates a stronger sense of self and more fulfillment. Reason number 4, having a big vision helps you take full advantage of what life has to offer. And finally, reason number 4, having a big vision makes you more resilient. Alright. If that all speaks to you, you might be the perfect fit for the brave new path retreat. If you are tired of playing it safe, you want to commit to a big vision, but you're not quite sure what that is yet, or you don't trust yourself, you don't have the necessary conviction, you are full of doubt, then join us.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:26:22]:

Like I said, there are 9 beds, and if you think one of them belongs to you, go to selfgrowthnerds.com/retreat. This is happening from October 4th to October 7, 2024, and tickets are available right now. Lastly, if you cannot make it to the retreat but you're still interested in this work, we can also work together 1 on 1. Just go to selfgueltenerds.com/ school and you'll be able to book a free assessment call to see if we're a good fit. And I have to tell you, these calls are amazing. I had one earlier today and I come out on fire because what happens during this, it's like 45 minutes to an hour I pull your dreams out of you. We get to the truth of what you really, really want and why you have not acted on it yet. It can be quite emotional for some people.

Marie-Pier Tremblay [00:27:26]:

And if you want, if you feel compelled, then we make a plan to actually turn these desires into a reality so that your life is not just fine, but like I said many times in this episode, it becomes extraordinary. Okay. I wish you all a wonderful, wonderful week and I will talk to you soon. Bye. If you love what you're hearing on the South Girl Nerds podcast and you want individual help finding a new direction for your life and developing the courage to make your dreams a reality, you have to check out how we can work together on selfgrowthnerds.com or message me on instagram@selfgrowthnerds. My clients say they would have needed that support years ago. So if you're tired of feeling like you're wasting your life, don't wait. Get in touch now, and I cannot wait to meet you.

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Episode 180: Commitment Instead of Confidence

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Episode 178: Defeating Quick Dopamine and Impatience